


Alone Together

by Multifandom_damnation



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Dialogue Heavy, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Families of Choice, Firehouse 118 Family (9-1-1), Gen, Gift Giving, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Natural Disasters, Post-Tsunami (9-1-1), Protective Team, Sad Evan "Buck" Buckley, Sleepovers, Surprise Party, Survivor Guilt, Team Bonding, Team as Family, Touch-Starved, Touchy-Feely
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-30
Updated: 2020-04-30
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:15:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,445
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23926759
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Multifandom_damnation/pseuds/Multifandom_damnation
Summary: Buck fears that he's going to end up like Red, alone and forgotten at the end of his life, but the 118 go above and beyond to make sure he knows that would never- could never- happen. Not in a million years.Oh, and Chris helps too. Chris is a big help, actually.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley & Firehouse 118 Crew
Comments: 30
Kudos: 196
Collections: 9-1-1 Tales





	Alone Together

**Author's Note:**

> So, as I said on my Lone Star fic, I can really only watch the show through the few clips I'm able to find on YouTube because nobody likes to give us anything down here in good old AUS, but I was able to watch my first episode a few days ago, and I loved it. It's such a good show. I ship Buddy just as much as the rest of you, but I adore best buds/co-parents Eddie and Buck because it gives us more to work on because it's already canon. I also love the rest of the team as a team, you know?? I don't really understand what's been going on with Red and stuff like that, but I just want to give Buck a hug. From the little bits that I've seen, he's been through a lot. I just wanted to write a fic that sort of addresses what's been happening lately but also leaves it pretty bland in terms of story, because I didn't want to dive too deep into a storyline I don't really understand. But! I know the tsunami pretty well, so there's a lot about the tsunami going on here. I feel like that was SUCH a big part of Buck's life that I can't believe that it didn't leave more of an impact??? Anyway, there's a lot of tsunami talk in this. This is mostly based off of some gifs I saw on Tumblr about everyone blowing Buck off. WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY is that I just wanted to make a fic where they genetically apologize for not realizing how sad he has been without him making a big explosive deal of it, you know???? Anyway, enough of my rambling. I hope you enjoy xx

It was a few days after Red passed, and Buck was alone in his apartment, waiting for the yearly tribute to those lost during the tsunami. It was more of a memorial than a tribute, but Buck liked to watch it anyway.

He hadn’t seen the 118 for a long time, not since Red’s send-off at the hospital. Their shifts just hadn’t lined up as of late, and Buck found himself missing them more than he’d admit. But they were pretty busy- even Maddy had been on call more often than not. But Buck didn’t mind. He had a lot to think about, anyway.

Red had been a good friend, for the very little time that Buck had known him. He had so many stories, and no matter how many times Buck heard them, he was just as invested every time. Buck knew that he worried about ending up alone and forgotten like Red, but despite all that, Buck just hoped he had made Red’s last days on earth the best of his life. It meant a lot to him that Red knew he wouldn’t be forgotten. 

Well, Buck hoped he had. His biggest concern was that he had made Red’s last days a living hell by making it all about him, and his worries again. That would just suck.

The night was late when there was a knock on his door, and confused, he stood up from the couch and muted the TV to answer it. He never would have expected to see Hen standing there, holding two packs of beer in her hands and beaming at Buck with that smile that always seemed to settle his nerves no matter what. “Uh- Hen,” Buck smiled, but his brows were pulled together as he opened the door for her to enter. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m here to celebrate,” Hen laughed like it was obvious and Buck shut the door behind her as she wiped her boots on the mat. She looked around the room at the dirty dishes in the sink and the mess, and he cringed inwardly. If he’d known he’d be having guests, he would have cleaned up a little. “I felt bad that I blew you off for drinks after that rescue the other day, so I’m here to make it up to you.” she turned around and waved the beers around a bit. “Where should I put these?”

“Uh,” Buck was so confused that his brain short-circuited for a moment. “In the fridge, I guess.” He took the cases from Hen and let her make herself comfortable. “You really didn’t have to come. I mean, I appreciate it, but it wasn’t necessary.”

“I didn’t have anything planned,” Hen said as she took off her coat and folded it over her arm. “I would have called ahead, but I thought you’d like the surprise.”

While Buck was on his knees trying to make room in the fridge for the beer, Hen wandered around the room, making herself comfortable. It had been a while since she’d been in Buck’s flat, and it had changed a lot since then. It was messy, yes, but that was to be expected. His friend just died. Hen wasn’t about to get on him for not cleaning up for her unexpected arrival. 

She gravitated towards the TV, where a count down was flashing in the corner of the screen and a reporter in a red dress walked across the front of the pier, holding the microphone. “What are you watching?” she called over her shoulder to Buck, as she watched people holding candles come into frame.

Standing up, Buck shut the fridge door and wiped his hands on his pants. “The annual tsunami tribute. I try and watch it when I can. I think this time is special because from what I’ve heard, they’ve finally managed to get-”

He was interrupted by another knock on the door, and he froze in his tracks with one hand running through his hair. The look on his face was so comical that Hen almost laughed. She turned to him, trying to seem nonchalant, but secretly trying to hold back her smile. “You should get that.”

“Hen…” Buck began, looking suspicious and a little afraid. “What’s going on?”

“I have no idea,” Hen lied. “But it’s rude to keep someone waiting at the doorstep.”

Sending her a final distrusting look, Buck left Hen in the lounge as he turned on his heel and opened the door once again, not expecting to see Bobby there, shuffling his feet on the doormat that Maddie had insisted Buck add to the exterior of his house, holding a large wrapped gift under his arm and a bunch of flowers in his other hand. “Hey Buck,” he said a little sheepishly. He jerked his chin towards the house. “Can I come in?”

“Oh, yeah, Bobby, of course,” Buck stumbled out of the way as Bobby walked inside. “Um, what’s all this for?”

“I wasn’t going to bring anything,” Bobby explained. “But Athena thought that would be rude, so we went shopping this afternoon. The flowers are a gift from Athena, but part of me thinks it was your sister’s idea.”

Blinking, Buck took the items from Bobby and stared at them, wide-eyed, before he realized that he probably looked like an idiot. “Bobby, I uh, I don’t know what to say. Thank you? You really didn’t need to go through all the effort…”

Bobby shrugged. “No effort at all. You’re not a very hard person to buy for if you know what you’re interested in. Do you have a vase for those flowers?”

As Bobby walked towards the kitchen, where he nodded to Hen in greeting and Hen smiled knowingly, Buck was busy trying to understand what the hell was happening. There was no way in hell that any of this was a coincidence. Especially not if Hen had brought his favourite beer and Bobby had brought him… gifts and flowers? He wasn’t sure which one was weirder. “I mean, probably not, but I think I’ve got a big enough cup that I could fill with water.”

“Really, Buck?” Hen scoffed as she entered the kitchen and helped Bobby look for a large enough vase. “You can’t just use a _cup_. You need something nice to put in the middle of your table for guests to see.”

“Well, I mean, it’s not exactly like I get a lot of guests,” Buck pointed out as he put the gift on the table and awkwardly held the flowers in one hand while he watched his friends go through all his cabinets. 

“You do tonight,” Bobby said as he triumphantly held up a greenish-blue vase from the back of a high cabinet that had Maddie’s name written all over it, and rinsed it under the tap to rid it of dust and grime before filling it up with water. “Well? Are you going to open your gift or not?”

Hen came over to take the flowers from him, and Buck dumbly looked down at the parcel as she took the paper off the bunch and stuck them in the vase. “Bobby, you really didn’t have to.”

“I didn’t do anything I didn’t want to, Buck,” Bobby insisted as he leant against the kitchen counter with his arms crossed, Hen resting beside him with a proud look on her face. They both looked at Buck expectantly as he slowly reached down to pick the gift up again. Underneath the coloured wrapping paper and silky silver ribbon that was obviously Athena’s special touch, Buck was surprised to find a couple of books, all of which either talking about natural disasters or disabled athletes or famous first responders. 

Quietly, Buck carded through the pages with wide eyes. He was keenly aware of Bobby and Hen watching him, but for a moment, he didn’t care. It was such a thoughtful gift that Buck was actually taken aback. He knew that the 118 were close, but he didn’t think they knew him this well… “Wow, thanks, Bobby. These are great.”

Bobby’s shoulders relaxed incrementally as he relaxed. “Good. I’m glad you like them. I was a little bit spoiled for choice at the book store, and I had hoped I’d picked the right ones.”

“No way, these are awesome,” Buck laughed as he flicked through them. “But what’s the occasion? Beer? Flowers and great books? What gives?”

For a short moment of silence where Bobby and Hen shared an unreadable look before Bobby shrugged. “No occasion. I’m allowed to do nice things for my crew, aren’t I? We don’t have to be on duty to be a team,” he nodded to the TV. “Were we interrupting something?”

Buck had completely forgotten the program he was going to watch, and he put the books down to turn the TV off of mute to see how much of it he had missed. Not much by the looks of it. They were just moving onto another series of ads. “The annual tsunami memorial.”

There was another pause, but this one was different. “Why are you watching this?” Bobby asked, and his voice was soft, almost sympathetic.

Instead of answering, Buck just shrugged. He wasn’t sure how to answer. He didn’t even know if he had one. He turned back to his guests but left the volume on the TV. “So, what are we doing? What’s the plan? Obviously, this whole thing was planned, because I rarely have one of you at my place, much less both of you. What super secret thing have you got going on behind the scenes?”

“The plan?” Hen asked with a laugh. “Right now, the only plan is to wait for Chim. He’s late. As I said he would be,” the last comment was ended with a pointed look at Bobby, who just smiled.

“Wait,” Buck held his hands up to silence them, though nobody but the TV was making a sound. “Chim’s coming too?”

His question was answered by a single, heavy _thump!_ at the door like someone had kicked at it and a series of frustrated muttering that made it through the wood. Buck went to answer it without preamble to find Chim standing there, partially hidden by the bags and boxes that smelled like warm food and laden down his arms. “Oh, Buck, thank god. Help, these are heavy.”

Quickly, Buck took half the items from Chim and helped him inside, taking a moment to lock the door behind him. When they put the food on the table, they were met by a displeased Hen and a Bobby who was trying to stifle a laugh. “Chim?” Hen sighed. “What the hell is this?”

“What?” Chim fired back, wiping his hands on his jacket. “You told me to get the food, but you never told me where to get it from. I just got a little of everything, is all.” He looked Buck up and down. “Hey man. You look like shit.”

“Yeah, well, I didn’t exactly expect to have guests over,” Buck replied as he slapped Chim on the back. “Does anyone one to tell me what’s going on here? Anyone at all?”

They all looked instinctively to Bobby, who sighed and ran a hand down his face. “Alright, Buck, here’s the deal. We’ve felt… bad, as of late, that we haven’t been as involved as we should have been. We blew you off the other night when you wanted to celebrate-”

“You guys were all busy,” Buck interrupted. “I didn’t blame you. You had things to do. I don’t expect everyone to stop what they’re doing to tend to my every beck and call.”

“I know that,” Bobby said gently. “But that didn’t mean that we couldn’t reschedule. But that’s not all. We uh…” he trailed off, at a loss for words, and looked to Hen and Chim for help. Chim just shrugged, hopelessly.

“We’re a team,” Hen filled in for him, and Bobby looked grateful. “And we look out for our own. We know that you cared about Red, and I know that you saw a lot of yourself in him, but we didn’t want you to be alone tonight.”

Buck felt like all the air had left his body. “And how would you possibly know that?” he asked slowly, quietly, as the meaning behind the words finally made sense in his head.

Chim shrugged again, but it was a different kind of shrug. “We know you, Buck. Maybe not as well as we should, yeah, but we know how your brain works, when it’s not too busy trying to put you in dangerous situations and saving lives. We get it.”

“This isn’t a special occasion or anything,” Hen insisted. “We just realized that we hadn’t spent time with each other, just us, and wanted to make it up to you. Nothing big. Just some good mates hanging out on the couch, watching TV, drinking good beer and eating good food.”

“A celebration in retrospect,” Bobby said. “For your rescue the other day. And every other rescue before it that we never got to go out for.”

Nobody spoke as Buck looked at each of them fully, judging if they were serious, catching their eye. “And this has nothing to do with Red or anything.”

“Not really, but it has everything to do with _you_ ,” Hen said. “You’ve been having a bit of a rough time, lately. With getting crushed by a truck and your sister being chased and being caught in the tsunami and the embolism… we just thought that we should do something nice. Something special and… unexpected. To celebrate _you_. Not the job. _You_ , Evan Buckley.”

Buck didn’t know what to say. He swallowed thickly, and nodded, trying very hard to ignore the stinging behind his eyes. “Yeah,” he said and cleared his throat when he didn’t like the way he sounded. “Yeah, alright. Lets… let’s do this.”

Beaming, Hen reached out and wrapped her arms around Buck for the tightest hug of his life, and Bobby rested a heavy, comforting hand on his shoulder. It had been a while since Buck had had so much contact, and he was secretly loving it. As Chim waited his turn, he turned to watch the TV. “Hey, what’s with the tsunami report thing?”

“It’s an annual memorial,” Buck corrected as he pulled away from Hen and Bobby to turn the volume up. “And I watch it whenever it’s on. But this time, I think they managed to get the cameras working.”

Bobby frowned. “Cameras?”

“Security cameras, from nearby buildings and cars and things like that,” Buck explained as he leaned over the back of the couch. “A lot of it was pretty washed out by the flood, but they managed to salvage some and they’ve been working on, like, restoring and recovering it since. They’re going to show it on tonight’s tribute.”

There was a pause. “Why would you want to watch that?” Chim asked, aghast.

“And whose dumb idea was it to put that kind of thing on TV?” Hen said, just as surprised.

Buck just shrugged. It was hard to explain, but he had been waiting for this all week, so he wasn’t going to justify it to people who would never, could never, understand. “I want to know what happened. I want to… I don’t know. There was a lot of people at that pier when it struck. I know for a fact I didn’t save as many as I should have.”

“Buck,” Bobby said quietly, and there was shuffling behind him. “There’s nothing more you could have done.”

But then the scene on the TV changed to that of a grainy, far-away camera angle from somewhere above the water level, and suddenly they were watching the surge of water and people running away and-

If Buck squinted, he could see him and Christopher towards the back, and the sight of them leaping for cover behind the stall. A few seconds later, the stall was blown down the steam in ruined bits, and Chris’s head popped out of the water, his arms wrapping around the metal pole and his crutches disappearing in the water. Eventually, Buck’s head emerged from the foamy water, and it showed him paddling towards Christopher and holding onto him tight and eventually carrying him onto the roof of the sunken fire truck. The camera angle switched, to the road, to another building, to people making it to the exit, before the water knocked out their legs and they fell, to some other people taking refuge on top of cars and buildings. Sometimes they showed a body, drifting downstream. Then it was back to Buck and Chris, as Buck was grabbing the firehose and swimming as hard as he could across the rushing water to a woman losing her grip on her handhold. He helped drag her back to safety, and then nothing new happened for a few moments before Buck was leaping off again and stretching the rope as far as he could so the people being swept towards and past him could grab on and pull themselves to safety to the firetruck. Back to the front entrance. Back to the medic station that had been put up and first responders were arriving. Bodies fished from the swell. Back to people taking refuge far away. Then back to Buck, stumbling through the water as he wordlessly screamed for Christopher, reaching through the water as if he could be so lucky as to grab him, panicking, screaming, _screaming_ -

Buck pointed at the TV. Behind him, there was silence, and Buck almost didn’t want to look. “This is where I lost him,” he said, “I think he fell off the back while I was trying to help someone else. I uh… I know I should have been watching him, but I just… I couldn’t let those people die.”

“That’s what makes you a good firefighter, Buck,” Bobby said, though his voice sounded thick. “A good man, too. Saving lives on and off duty.”

“Heart of gold,” Chim added.

Hen reached out and placed and hand on Buck’s shoulder, and he turned a little to look her in the eye. “Turn this off, Buck. Let’s make this night about positive things. Not about trauma.”

There were a lot of things that Buck wanted to say to that, but he wasn’t sure if they would understand, and he didn’t want to make a big deal of it when they were going so far out of their way to help him, so he kept his mouth shut and turned off the TV, but not before hitting record on the program. For later. For himself.

“Yeah,” He said, decisive. This would be a good night. He was surrounded by people he loved, and people he hoped loved him back, and they had come here, on their night off, to make him feel better since he’d been moping and feeling sorry for himself. It would be a good night whether he wanted it or not. “Yeah, your right. No more tsunami talk for tonight. It’s about beer and books and food tonight.”

There was a loud commotion at the front door as the doorknob was shaken and the deadbolt unlocked from the outside, and suddenly it was being thrown open, and none other than Eddie Diaz stood at the threshold of the front door, putting his key to Buck’s flat back into his pocket. “Hey guys, sorry I’m late, hope I didn’t miss the party,” he nodded to Buck with that cocky smile on his face. “Hey, Buck.”

“Hey Eddie,” Buck said weakly. 

Rubbing his hands together, Eddie looked towards the table that was full of food and flowers and books and chuckled. “Sorry, I didn’t bring any gifts. Only so many hours in a day, you know? I brought the next best thing, though.”

From behind him, his bright blue crutches catching in the hallway light, his red glasses second brightest only to his smile, looking very dapper in his favourite formal-ish outfit, was Christopher, practically shoving his dad out of the way in his haste to enter the room. “Hey, Buck!”

Buck was across the room and on his knees in front of Chris before he knew it, and Chris was wrapping his arms around him and resting his whole weight on him, both of them feeling safe in each other's arms. “Hey buddy, what are you doing here?”

“We’re here to see you!” Chris laughed into his ear, and it was the sweetest sound that Buck had ever heard. “Dad said that you were sad, and I wanted to come over to make you feel a little better. I’m sorry about your friend.”

“Uh,” Buck choked out. “Thanks, bud. Well, I’m glad to see you! I’ve been thinking about coming over all week but, I’ve uh, I’ve been busy. Really busy.”

“I wanted dad to bring me, but he said you didn’t want visitors,” Chris said, and he was giggling even before he finished speaking. “But I told him that you didn’t mean me.”

“You’re always welcome here, Chris. You both know that,” Buck laughed as he rubbed Chris’s back. He looked up at Eddie, who was leaning against the wall with the smug expression that Buck would usually want to punch off his face that now just filled him with nothing but joy. “And what was your part in this conniving plan?”

“Just to bring the heart and soul of this whole operation,” Eddie shrugged. “He wanted to quickly watch that tsunami tribute they have on all the time, but we didn’t have the time. We were late as we were. And uh, I don’t like him watching it either.”

“Don’t let him,” Hen said sincerely but tried to mask it with a laugh. “It was pretty dark. They got some footage, too. Recovered tapes or something. I wish we hadn’t seen it.”

“I’ve put it on record,” Buck said. “So we can watch it another time. Well, at least, I'm planning on watching it again.”

The comment was followed by silence, and Buck just sat there on the cold floor, relishing in Christopher's embrace, the feel of him against his torso, solid and familiar and _there_ in all his glory. Part of him didn’t want to move, but the other part knew that he couldn't sit on the floor with him forever. He still didn’t move though. He placed a kiss on Christopher's hair, and ran his fingers down the back of his head, cradling it in his palm. “Thanks for coming, little buddy,” Christopher just laughed that charming laugh of his, and that was all that Buck needed to hear. 

Eventually, Eddie clapped his hands together and broke the silence that had fallen over the room. “Right! Let’s get this show on the road. The food’s getting cold, and I need a drink. Chris, you go sit on the couch and you get to pick what movie we watch tonight. Buck can help me get your sleeping bag out of the car. You keep an eye on the adults, alright?”

“OK,” Chris beamed, obviously pleased with his task.

But Buck was frowning at Eddie. “What’s the sleeping bag for?”

“Oh, didn’t Hen tell you?” Chim interrupted, looking at Hen expectantly. “Or was that part of the surprise too?”

“I thought it was obvious,” Hen said with a shrug. “But we’re having a sleepover. We’ve cancelled our shifts for tomorrow, so we have nothing to worry about.”

“Wait, you’re staying here? Tonight?” Buck wanted to stand up in shock, but he didn’t want to leave Chris, so he ended up just staying where he was, looking up at them, aghast.

Bobby laughed and reached down to ruffle Buck’s hair like he was a child, and Buck made a face at him but didn’t pull away. The contact was nice, even if it was a little on the rougher side. “Where else would we be staying? A hotel? Of course we’re staying here. You’ve got the room for it.”

“You think I brought those beer’s without the intent to drink them?” Hen scoffed. “We’re going to spend some time together. Good food, good drink, good company. It’ll be fun.”

As Eddie handed Chris his crutches and helped him push away from Buck, he stood up and looked around at the team. Team? No. That word was too weak. Especially after tonight. “I haven’t had this many in my place for a long time. I’m not going to lie… I’d enjoy the company. I’ve missed this, I guess. I know that sounds dumb and that I literally have no excuse but…”

“Hush,” Hen said. “None of that tonight. This is a positive get-together, and if I hear any of that self-deprecating bullshit come out of your mouth tonight, Buckley…”

She was interrupted by Eddie clamping his hands over Christopher's ears, and Chris laughing as he tried to pull them away. “There’s a child in the room Hen! Watch your mouth!” but he was laughing too, so it wasn’t that serious.

“Oh my god,” Buck found himself laughing as Chim hit Hen lightly in the shoulder and Bobby was pretending to look stern and disappointed while Chris was squealing in his dad's arms as Eddie swung him side to side “This is going to be a disaster. I’m so excited.”

They spend the night eating more food than was necessary and drinking as much as they wanted and talking about absolutely anything and everything from siblings to relationship issues to school work to natural disasters to perfect rescues and Red and the 118. They all watched Chris’s chosen movie, all piled on top of each other on the couch, limbs tangled in limbs, and laughed until their bellies hurt, and they fell asleep on the couch like it was the most natural thing in the world.

Buck forgot how much he missed it, and he was glad that he still had it. The touch was nice, the closeness was nice, but nicest of all it was nice that they had thought of him in the first place, and had decided to come over and make a surprise of it. They hadn’t known what was wrong, but they wanted to help anyway, and that gave Buck a little hope. Maybe he wouldn’t end up like Red. Maybe he could still have a future. Maybe it would all end up alright.

Christopher put his head in his lap, fast asleep and breathing softly and Buck slowly went back to sleep, his hand in Chris’s hair.

**Author's Note:**

> Some of you might have seen this on my Tumblr the other day, but I watched my first ep of 911 lately (it doesn't count because it was 3x9 but anyway) and I was watching it with my mum and during the kitchen scene she looked at me and asked "are they gay?" so there you go.
> 
> Listen, guys, I really don't' like this fic but I need to get rid of it because I'm going to rip my hair out any longer, so I'm sorry if it's shitty and the story is wrong or the characterization is shit, I really tried but I'm just... sick of it. So here ya go.


End file.
